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And here’s the Palindrome
One of my New Years resolutions was to blog more often so here I am.
Remember how I got accepted for publication in Agenda Poetry’s Online Broadsheets? Remember how that was supposed to happen in August? Still hasn’t happened. I’m pretty peeved. If I didn’t know better I’d think they were a scam rather than a legit poetry journal. I think it’s time to send them another email asking why they’re almost six months late with their newest issue. The biggest lesson I’ve learned over this past year is that literature moves slowly. You submit your writing and you wait for an eternity just to hear back. You’d think they could act a little more quickly – especially for rejections since those are generally form letters and presumably it takes less time to send those. Ugh.
But I found something I just had to share with everyone who reads this:
This article is absolutely brilliant. I think that Sarah Palin is particularly challenged, but I will admit that most people’s speech would produce rather inelegant sentence diagrams. That said, sentence diagramming could become a fabulous political weapon. I mean, most people want their politicians to speak clearly, right? Think about it: legions of grammarians with their sentence diagrams marching on the White House in protest of the unclear speech of modern US presidential candidates. How awesome would that be?
The U.S. Post Office has decided to increase the pricing on its stamps: http://www.usps.com/prices/
This makes me extremely unhappy. Why? Because I’m nervous that all of the SASEs that I sent out will no longer work since the postage will be wrong! I’m scared that I might not hear back from the journals I sent poems out to, since the postage I put on the stamps will no longer be sufficient for them to mail back their replies. What I don’t get this: Why doesn’t the Post Office make all of their stamps “Forever” stamps (the kind that carry over during the price increases)? It’s not like they’re getting a bigger profit on those stamps – they cost the same amount as regular stamps. It makes no sense to me. But the bigger issue is this: because of a one penny increase in stamp prices I might not hear back about my poems. Not cool. Not cool at all.
It takes SO LONG to hear back from poetry journals! I sent out poems on March 1st and still haven’t heard from the majority of them. I wouldn’t mind that so much if they allowed simultaneous submissions but many of the better journals don’t which means I end up waiting for months to hear back about the poems before I’m able to send them anywhere else. It could take years to get a single poem published at this rate even if it was the best poem in the world since I’m assuming it takes a minimum of 3-5 attempts before one of the journals decides to publish it and each attempt ties the poem up for 4-6 months. Ugh! Also, I’m anxious about several journals which have rejected only some of the poems I sent them (and therefore they haven’t rejected the others – at least not yet). This is how I always felt with violin auditions when I was younger, except that there was always a definitive date when they got back to you so the anxiety was less generalized. Grrrrrrrrr…
There are few things on earth that irk me more than leetspeak (aka “1337” aka they style of typing I just used in the title to this post). My partner Ren says that this form of typing began because people did not want what they were typing to end up in search engines. That’s all well and good – I mean, with Google becoming more ubiquitous I’m sure everyone would like a little more Internet anonymity. I still fondly remember the early days of the Internet when I used leetspeak to type things my parents couldn’t read (muahaha). BUT people aren’t really using leetspeak as a code anymore since everyone gets it now (even my Internet-challenged parents). Now people use it because…? Who knows! There’s no point now. The point is gone. Which means that if you’re typing in leetspeak you’re behind the times and you need to grow a brain and get with the program. Or, if you insist on typing in 1337, do it with intention. Go and visit this website or this website so you know the history of your language.
Side note: Ren thinks I should delve deeper to discover the reasons I hate leetspeak so much. I don’t have to delve because I already know why I hate it. I hate leetspeak because I’m a grammar snob and I view it as a bastardization of the beautifully pure English language (or something like that). Actually, I find leetspeak kind of interesting. It’s just that it really annoys me that so many people do this for no reason and seem to think it makes them cool.
@LL c0mm3n7$ t0 7h1$ p0$7 mu$7 b 1n 7337 or 1 w1LL d3L373 th3m!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!
Translation: All comments to this post must be in leetspeak or I will delete them!